How to Create Only Satisfying Relationships

Decide who you are. Who are You for you? Decide the behaviors that are acceptable to you and decide that people who treat you in ways that are not acceptable to you do not belong in your life.

You get to choose who you play with. Life is an adventure to savor–not a drudgery to get through. Do you really want to continue the dramas? Maybe you like it. Maybe that is comfortable for you. Or, maybe it is just a habit you do not see.

When I practiced psychotherapy, I often worked in Competency Based therapy. That means each person has a communication style they employ that works for them. That style may be one where they constantly create arguments. OR maybe they need to create drama or high emotions to get others to come to their rescue.

The point is, whatever style one employs, they do so out of their awareness. By creating a relationship with a therapist, they do in the microcosm of the therapeutic relationship what they do in the macrocosm that composes their world.

Remember, how you do anything is how you do everything.

If you find yourself in an unhappy relationship, first decide what you want from that person. Determine whether or not you even want that person in your life now. After all, you change every day. People who fit into your world before may no longer fit–or you may no longer fit into their world.

Know your terms of the relationship. Make that commitment to yourself–in all your relationships. Just because you have known someone a long time does not mean they currently belong in your life.

When I was injured years ago, I discovered that some people who I had thought were my friends really weren’t. They could not handle seeing me in an altered state–with lots of struggles over the long healing period. And they dropped out of my world when I most needed them.

Surprisingly, some people I didn’t even count as friends came forth. You see, you never know who is a friend to you until you define the term “relationship.”

Take a good look at yourself. See the beautiful person who you truly are. Demand respect–from yourself first and then from every single person in your life

The behavior patterns that create your relationships operate out of your awareness–on automatic, The bottom line is only you can change your life…when you are ready to do so. Knowing the programs running your subconscious mind allows you to override what does not work and replace it with programs that do work.

I can show you—but you have to ask.

About Ali Bierman

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4 Responses to How to Create Only Satisfying Relationships

  1. A very powerful — and emotional — read for me this morning, Ali; some of which I needed to hear, and not only from within my own mind. “Just because you have known someone a long time does not mean they currently belong in your life.”

    • Ali Bierman says:

      Isn’t it amazing, PeggyLee, how the Universe guides us to exactly what we need? Well, it always does only so very many people have not yet discovered how to recognize those messages. I am grateful you found what you needed. Do ask me any question you have.

  2. Owen says:

    Excellent information, incredible site design, maintain the good work

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